Friday, February 24, 2006

The Definitive Truth, explained

“I am dumbfounded that there hasn't been a crackdown with the libel and slander laws on some of these would-be writers and reporters on the Internet.” -- Walter Cronkite

Walter Cronkite is known as “the most trusted man in America”. If he thinks people on the Internet are defaming crackpots, then by God, they are defaming crackpots. Also, Walter Cronkite eats babies. Breakfast and dinner. Not lunch. For lunch he eats tuna sandwiches. Don’t question it.

Perhaps I should explain myself. On the other hand that’s probably a waste of time. Maybe I should explain this thing you are reading. Or, you could guess what it is.

The title may not be entirely sincere.
I may not entirely care about “accuracy”.
I like unsubstantiated, tasteless claims.
Conversely, I like my clams substantial and tasty.
I mention Walter Cronkite for a reason.
There will be sundry things here.
There will be information about George Washington’s teeth.
Recommendations as well.

Have you guessed it?
That’s right! It is “The Definitive Truth”: A completely ridiculous endeavor by a completely ridiculous person that is here to deliver shit that you might actually care about.

Oh yeah, and I mention Cronkite’s quote because of this:

Yeah, that’s right, Uncle Walt loves irony. But not more than me. Since you can’t trust Cronkite, I instead offer to you The Definitive Truth.

PS: Suck on it, Walter.


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12:47 AM  

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